A Letter Home From a Professor

Yo, wazzup…
Mr. and Mrs. Slinker.
Let me begin by saying,

stating,
proclaiming,
whispering,
screaming,
mumbling,
asking!

Billy is a wonderful kid,
Truly a pleasure…
To have in class, I mean.

Now, let me chillax and elaborate, you fuckers.
(Yeah, I said it. Everybody thinks it.)
Billy is a shining beacon of hope,
Of knowledge.
He lifts my spirits with his political knowledge,
his radical new ideas,
his radical new hairstyles.
His essay on the dichotomy
Of love and lice in
Sagan’s opus was
Fucking incredible.

Signed,
Professor Warbling Absteen
Grade 1
Carl Perkins Elementary School.