Cocteau

The last thing Jacques Cocteau smelled

was freshly mown grass;

he'dn't known he'd

die on a golf course.

But I did.

Because I killed him.

Lordy!

Lordy took a stroll on Tues

'round piccadilly square.

Thrice he saw the creepling man,

and twice he didn't care.

But on the third he stopped,

(his passions all aflame).

For there there stood the creepling man

flashing all his shame.

Lordy took a sneakling peek

at the absent trouser-door.

I say it only sneakling

'cause he promptly hit the floor.

The street-performing robot

had whizzed and buzzed about.

When shame flashed at his metal face,

his buzz became a shout!

"Get him!" Cried the Bobbies.

My eyes!" Cried the Fruit.

"Can no one save our ruined souls

from this exhibitionary brute?!"

Up arose good Lordy

from his shame-inducéd trance.

Sore but not downtrodden,

he started his advance.

The creepling saw him coming!

They traded blow for blow!

"He knows my every move so well!

This shame-exposing foe..."

All the gods were watching.

The crowd discharged their jeers.

Lordy'd never fought like this

in all his earthly years!

The creepling stood there dangling.

Lordy'd had enough!

"Let's end this once for all!" he yelled,

"Show me your stuff!"

The creepling man pulled off his skin.

T'was a sight like none no other!

'Fore Lordy stood a maiden fair.

And that's how he met your mother.

Return Of The Repressed

Melanie fears skeletons,
but most of all,
perverts.

Melanie saw pictures
of an orangutan's bone
structure in dad's “creep”
book, but more disturbing,

that pervert's portrait
on the secret “extra”
page, signed,

Daniel “Pervert” Brown.

I Made You Dinner

Refried pork fried rice:
a terrifying mélange
of Chinese manhood
in sweet home momma's
microwave oven.

Eleven heavy oxen couldn't pull
my weight, from here
to Mississippi, never mind
those pubescent apes,
grandkids.

“I'll save everybody a bite,”
is what I've never had the nerve
nor gusto to speak, easy over
and out the doggy door
to Mr. Mittens, that irreverent

Masterbator.

Chief Roswell

Chief Roswell flew last night,
While the lesser humans slept.
He flew like a rocket ghost,
Over the stars, and came crashing
Through your bedroom window,
Touting the merits of a well-groomed orifice.
I shot up disgusted - “Begone!”
A man’s got to sleep.

Rand Mcnally

Lookin' for Mount Mckinley
With Pa on Sunday, 1994

Looked it up in the ol'
Rand Mcnally
Got Directions, Estimated Time of Arrival:
1995

Trucked on through the slopes of el salvador
And the lushes of Madrid
I saw twin magicians in the markets of Giza
And I fed grapes to the kings of Ukraine

The Dead Cd broke in Xinjiang
And the truck broke down twice over the Bay of Bengal

And by the time we reached our destination (97')
The sign out front read:
Mount McGregor correctional facility

"Fuck" Said Pa.

Never Trust a Rand Mcnally

Bumphrey Hogart

I was never more embarassed
Than I was the day
Father ordered 10 rap scallions
at Gustav Floubert's Grecian Eatery

The humidity in that meat bunker
Was worse than the humidity is in
The maw of a young Gila Monster

After the dissapointed Grecian waiter left us
Strange eddys blew over father's plate
In an otherwise windless meat bunker

How odd
My brain said to my brain

Cherry Picker's Delight

"Where've all the cherries gone this season John?"
Asked THE BOSS
John Cavanaugh drew a blank
Drew Harrigan says he shoots blanks too
Looking over the
Wooden cherry trollop
And smooth regulators,
John Cavanaugh collected himself and began to speak....




"Th... th... the cherry pickin' seasons' over boss"

"Well then.." said BOSS, "Looks like it's time for summer vacation!"


cherry pickers delight

Chauncy Fluboré's Survival Guide

Crossing the road to perdition
Takes more than hearty legs
A brain of steel
A soul of Gold
For breakfast.. try to have eggs

And If perchance you meet a troll
Just tap him on the knee
It may seem silly
Or maybe wrong
But sure enough you'll see

That trolls my friend are made of ice
And ice is made of cash
And if it's cash your looking for
You'll soon develop rash

Across your face, across your eyes
And too across your chest
A pocket full of sunshine
And a rainbow in the west

And if you lose your way somehow
Be sure not to alarm
For primal bears and homonauts
Can surely cause you harm

Now of course your nigh to ask
How will this help me live?
The answer friend lies in your end
A cell phone's in your ass!

Dog Flower

Be as the dog flower,
Extend your snout and pollinate,
Wag tail and, bending toward the apple sky,
Lap up last sunlight; woofing...
Woof.

Mesopotamia

A man with no bones stalks in the desert.
He drags a long shadow, his marrow
sucked dry by the bald silhouette
of a skeletal vulture, Time
entombed in a pile of dust.

Dead fingers probe the vastness, waking
in an afterlife more bleak than before,
death upon death mistaken for life,
like stairs off these sunburnt cliffs,
engulfed in the pyre of burning air.

Chained to the withering wall, the man
with a ragged barbed beard buries his feet, steadying -
the earth shakes, quaking with fear, he, sinks
swallowed by the death mouth, the rats
converge, consume, leave a bloody trail
leading to the wet cave where the drowned men,

Play poker, echo, laugh and chew child's organs
dragging, dragging, drag their potbellied flesh engorged
intestines, from the charnel cave; swollen, blue
the blood waves break and locusts from the river bend
descend like pages from ancient volumes, burning

Beth Nahrain,
here is the pale flesh of the entombed masses,
here is,
your pound of flesh and blood
writhing in this fertile mud.

Dictionary.rand()

Toridonian drinkery. Heaven maraud offscourings! Undersuit,
surplus reincur corn picker, stumper College of Cardinals....
Intertropical Madagascan gemütlichkeit, T-Strap cerussite ascender.
Nullificationist rotator placability purine. Doggerelize scut!
Deem hip disease emptier; towering intertwist plant physiology,
recarry put-and-take.
Anglepod abaxial bath-stone. Fourier-series, Vickers-Test,
backwoods kibosh! Unionistic, mexican standoff.
Pistachio skip rope.
Immunoglobulin.
Reverb, varied thrush hoodoo; tub-thumping chapfallen...snowless.
Mineral-right-primordial-soup-cross-mate-jackboot-tactics-faux-pas-double-chinned.
Patent hyperparasitism: "de die in diem"!
Muttonfish quack ammo unclouded; incompassionate, rule-of-law centrally.
Holoscope(military-fold excludability), asepticize he-man....
............................................................................................................................................
"Demoniacal wafter cyanosis drinamyl.
Thanatos: apocalyptist vat-dye.
Switch tachycardiac, man-about-town pneumococcal?"

The Royal Labrador

Bowlful of wind,
Mouthful of coins,
Spitfire mandolin engulfs
The Royal Labrador.

Next stop Key West,
Flappers and the Gatsbys
Descend; conflagrant, boisterous
They topple, torpid -
White tuxedo slug ball.

Cooped up in dentist's,
Mouthful of coins,
Strange tools, these -
Doctor Doctor I'm
Irradiated.

Corpse Rock Castle

Uncork my juice flask;
Drench the carpet carpet.

the dancing I
how many times the times have I in
storm strewn corpse rock castle

Here is Procrustes' bed;
Take care to tuck tuck your tail in.

the dancing I
how many times the times have I in
storm strewn corpse rock castle

Sighing manor midnight manor;
Corporeal duchess slouches.

the dancing I
how many times the times have I in
storm strewn corpse rock castle

St. Upton Sinclair;
I built you a chair of roses.

the dancing I
how many times the times have I in
storm strewn corpse rock castle

Untimely mess this waistcoat;
Inconsiderate rain the rain below.

the dancing I
how many times the times have I in
storm strewn corpse rock castle